There’s a crisis before your mid-life one, & it’s called heartbreak.
(go ahead, smile with me because I am sure you can relate)
I was 27, and fresh out of a ten year relationship. The thought of navigating life after losing my safety net hit me like a knock out. Ten years is a looong time. It’s enough time to forget how to eat alone, or plan something without running it by someone for advice, or assurance. I spent a good year grieving, and despite feeling stuck in that emotional space, life was still moving on whether I was ready or not.
There’s no definitive moment where the birds sang and the warmth of the light touched, and I’m being honest because I frequently get asked, “When does the ache go away?” I don’t think it’ll ever escape you completely if it’s love. I do remember losing my patience being at home. That simple. I needed fresh air. Heartbreak is funny, one minute the thought of moving forward terrifies you, and then you’re giving yourself a pep talk about how you don’t *need* someone beside you just to move forward.
Somewhere in-between fear and curiosity, I booked a one way ticket — And this is my journey.
“I have always been capable, but I forgot what that meant, and how empowering it would be. I felt like I had been resuscitated. ”
I went on and flew 29 flights that year. I disconnected from life and sailed to Alaska & ventured through beautiful Canada. I took a train to New York and my dreams grew bigger. I embarked on my first solo European trip. Flew to London and overnight became a daredevil. My heart was revived in Paris. D.C. reminded me of my roots, Scottsdale is my new Vegas, & Napa changed my palate. Of course, I relived my early twenties in Vegas again, and again, and again... LA will always keep my soul young. I made it to Germany, and then found myself Rome-ing through Italy spontaneously for almost a month. And Denver will always remind me where home is.
I had the most empowering year to date. 2018 changed my entire momentum. That time I spent alone was something I needed to do to shift the energy in my life & redirect my mindset. I have always been capable, but I forgot what that meant, and how empowering it would be. I felt like I had been resuscitated. It’s a surreal experience — to be able to embrace every moment for yourself, and for its entirety. I crossed off SO many bucket-list ventures that were initially just ideas. I was living out of my comfort zone every minute. I grew. I became an enthusiast of life, of art, of culture... I unguarded my heart to new friendships, and learned so much about being present in your connections.
You feel everything so differently when you’re seeing it alone. I forget how brave I have become. And when the grandious adventure slowed down, and I found my way back home, it wasn’t heartbreak I felt anymore. It was gratitude. I was grateful for everything that grief gave me. Courage, and strength, independence, and an affinity for adventure.
REFLECT
What inspired you to get out? What places changed your life? I’d love to hear about the place that moved you, or was a must see destination that I need to add to my passport. I look forward to sharing more adventures with you. If you have any questions on travel related content, please share below for my next post on travel.
with love,
L